Subject: Comedy Central's All New Joke of the Day!
animals
Everyone's Doing It
Q: What's bright eyed and bushy tailed? A: A squirrel on crack.
Keep Laughing with our library of 10,000 Jokes!
Filed Under: animals, kids
Share This Joke:
http://www.jokes.com/funny/animals/everyone-s-doing-it
Add To:
Monday, November 24, 2008
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Martha Stewart's Holiday Calendar
Date: Wed, 17 Dec 1997 15:29:33 -0500
Dec. 1 Blanch carcass from Thanksgiving turkey. Spray-paint gold, turn upside down and use as a sleigh to hold Christmas cards.
Dec. 2 Have Morman Tabernacle Choir record outgoing Christmas message for answering machine.
Dec. 3 Using candlewick and hand-gilded pine cones, fashion cat-o'-nine-tails. Flog gardener.
Dec. 4 Address sympathy cards for all friends with elderly relatives, so that they're all ready to be mailed at the moment death occurs.
Dec. 5 Get new eyeglasses. Grind lenses myself.
Dec. 6 Fax family Christmas newsletter to Pulitzer committee for consideration.
Dec. 7 Debug Windows 97.
Dec. 10 Finish needlepoint colostomy bag cozy.
Dec. 11 Buy some cockroaches from the less fortunate; decorate eggs.
Dec. 12 Update enemies list. Place in hermetically sealed vault. Remove air, replace with nitrogen.
Dec. 13 Visit crematorium. Collect dentures. They make excellent pastry cutters, particularly for decorative pie crusts.
Dec. 14 Install plumbing in gingerbread house.
Dec. 15 Replace air in minivan tires with Glade "Holiday Scents" in case tires are shot out at the mall.
Dec. 17 Childproof the Christmas tree with garlands of razor wire.
Dec. 19 Adjust legs of chairs so each Christmas dinner guest will be the same height when sitting at his or her assigned seat.
Dec. 20 Dip sheep and cows in egg white and roll in confectioner's sugar to add a festive sparkle to the pasture.
Dec. 21 Outfit neighborhood rats with tiny antlers.
Dec. 22 Float votive candles in toilet tank.
Dec. 23 Seed clouds for White Christmas.
Dec. 24 Do my annual good deed: Go to several stores. Be seen engaged in last-minute Christmas shopping, thus making people feel less inadequate than they really are.
Dec. 25 Bear son. Swaddle. Lay in color-coordinated manger scented with homemade potpourri.
Dec. 26 Write and mail Christmas thank-yous. Order cards for next Christmas. Estimate number of cards needed by allowing for making new friends and actuarially appropriate death rates for current friends and relatives.
Dec. 27 Build snowman in exact likeness of God.
Dec. 29 Enter Style Invitational; win.
Dec. 31 New Year's Eve! Give staff their resolutions. Call a friend in each time zone of the world as the clock strikes midnight in that country.
Jan. 1 1998 Catch up on gardening. Sew leaves back onto trees. Do all cooking for 1998.
Date: Wed, 17 Dec 1997 15:29:33 -0500
Dec. 1 Blanch carcass from Thanksgiving turkey. Spray-paint gold, turn upside down and use as a sleigh to hold Christmas cards.
Dec. 2 Have Morman Tabernacle Choir record outgoing Christmas message for answering machine.
Dec. 3 Using candlewick and hand-gilded pine cones, fashion cat-o'-nine-tails. Flog gardener.
Dec. 4 Address sympathy cards for all friends with elderly relatives, so that they're all ready to be mailed at the moment death occurs.
Dec. 5 Get new eyeglasses. Grind lenses myself.
Dec. 6 Fax family Christmas newsletter to Pulitzer committee for consideration.
Dec. 7 Debug Windows 97.
Dec. 10 Finish needlepoint colostomy bag cozy.
Dec. 11 Buy some cockroaches from the less fortunate; decorate eggs.
Dec. 12 Update enemies list. Place in hermetically sealed vault. Remove air, replace with nitrogen.
Dec. 13 Visit crematorium. Collect dentures. They make excellent pastry cutters, particularly for decorative pie crusts.
Dec. 14 Install plumbing in gingerbread house.
Dec. 15 Replace air in minivan tires with Glade "Holiday Scents" in case tires are shot out at the mall.
Dec. 17 Childproof the Christmas tree with garlands of razor wire.
Dec. 19 Adjust legs of chairs so each Christmas dinner guest will be the same height when sitting at his or her assigned seat.
Dec. 20 Dip sheep and cows in egg white and roll in confectioner's sugar to add a festive sparkle to the pasture.
Dec. 21 Outfit neighborhood rats with tiny antlers.
Dec. 22 Float votive candles in toilet tank.
Dec. 23 Seed clouds for White Christmas.
Dec. 24 Do my annual good deed: Go to several stores. Be seen engaged in last-minute Christmas shopping, thus making people feel less inadequate than they really are.
Dec. 25 Bear son. Swaddle. Lay in color-coordinated manger scented with homemade potpourri.
Dec. 26 Write and mail Christmas thank-yous. Order cards for next Christmas. Estimate number of cards needed by allowing for making new friends and actuarially appropriate death rates for current friends and relatives.
Dec. 27 Build snowman in exact likeness of God.
Dec. 29 Enter Style Invitational; win.
Dec. 31 New Year's Eve! Give staff their resolutions. Call a friend in each time zone of the world as the clock strikes midnight in that country.
Jan. 1 1998 Catch up on gardening. Sew leaves back onto trees. Do all cooking for 1998.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Monday, November 10, 2008
Please be an 'angel' for a cold, lonely dog
Dear Terri,
As nasty winter weather sets in, neglected, backyard dogs face freezing cold, snow, wind, and rain. For many of these animals, a sturdily constructed doghouse can mean the difference between life and death. That's why PETA's wonderful "Angel for Animals" program is so important. Won't you be an "angel" for a lonely dog this year?
As an "angel" for animals, you can sponsor a specially designed and built doghouse that will provide a needy dog with shelter to see him or her through this winter--and the worst weather for many years to come.
Your sponsorship can immediately change the life of an animal like Spook. When PETA first met Spook, this lonely black dog was shivering outside in the cold. Spook was so big that everyone in the neighborhood was afraid to go near him. Our caseworkers saw that he wasn't aggressive, just energetic and anxious to play. So we unchained him and ran around with him in the yard. We gave him treats and lots of love and attention. Unfortunately, we then had no choice but to chain Spook up again and leave him there.
When PETA can't legally remove abused or neglected dogs, we do everything that we can to make them more comfortable. So we returned to Spook with a custom-built doghouse filled with warm straw bedding—which will give him a warmer place to curl up for years to come. We also gave him a tangle-free running line, an afternoon of playtime, tummy rubs, and a good scratch behind the ears: things that mean the world to lonely backyard dogs.
Last year, PETA provided more than 400 sturdy doghouses, thanks to generous "Angel for Animals" sponsors. With many more dogs in urgent need and temperatures dropping fast, we want to top that number this year, and I hope that we can count on your support. There are so many ways that you can help, including the following:
Your "Angel for Animals" sponsorship gift of $265 can provide a doghouse to one needy dog.
Your "Angel for Animals" sponsorship gift of $530 can provide doghouses to two neglected dogs.
Your "Angel for Animals" sponsorship gift of $1,325 can provide doghouses to five lonely outdoor dogs.
No matter how much you can afford to give, I urge you to respond today. I know that times are tough right now, but it is in times like these when unloved animals suffer most. Nearly all the dogs we reach with our "Angel for Animals" program live in underprivileged neighborhoods. We will fight as hard as we possibly can to ensure that these animals are not mistreated, forgotten, or ignored. Right now, these animals are facing another long winter with nowhere to hide from the stinging cold.
But you can give a doghouse to one lucky dog—likely the first "home" that he or she has ever had. Please become a PETA "Angel for Animals" doghouse sponsor today.
Thank you for helping a neglected dog this winter. Your simple act of kindness can bring one of these dear souls years of shelter, something that they all deserve.
Kind regards,
Ingrid E. Newkirk
President
P.S. Looking for a unique and meaningful gift this holiday season? Give a doghouse sponsorship! When you do, you'll be recognizing that compassionate person as an "angel" for animals. Each "Angel for Animals" sponsorship means that one more needy dog will get a solid-wood doghouse to protect him or her from the cold—and from the summer heat and sun—for years to come.
Dear Terri,
As nasty winter weather sets in, neglected, backyard dogs face freezing cold, snow, wind, and rain. For many of these animals, a sturdily constructed doghouse can mean the difference between life and death. That's why PETA's wonderful "Angel for Animals" program is so important. Won't you be an "angel" for a lonely dog this year?
As an "angel" for animals, you can sponsor a specially designed and built doghouse that will provide a needy dog with shelter to see him or her through this winter--and the worst weather for many years to come.
Your sponsorship can immediately change the life of an animal like Spook. When PETA first met Spook, this lonely black dog was shivering outside in the cold. Spook was so big that everyone in the neighborhood was afraid to go near him. Our caseworkers saw that he wasn't aggressive, just energetic and anxious to play. So we unchained him and ran around with him in the yard. We gave him treats and lots of love and attention. Unfortunately, we then had no choice but to chain Spook up again and leave him there.
When PETA can't legally remove abused or neglected dogs, we do everything that we can to make them more comfortable. So we returned to Spook with a custom-built doghouse filled with warm straw bedding—which will give him a warmer place to curl up for years to come. We also gave him a tangle-free running line, an afternoon of playtime, tummy rubs, and a good scratch behind the ears: things that mean the world to lonely backyard dogs.
Last year, PETA provided more than 400 sturdy doghouses, thanks to generous "Angel for Animals" sponsors. With many more dogs in urgent need and temperatures dropping fast, we want to top that number this year, and I hope that we can count on your support. There are so many ways that you can help, including the following:
Your "Angel for Animals" sponsorship gift of $265 can provide a doghouse to one needy dog.
Your "Angel for Animals" sponsorship gift of $530 can provide doghouses to two neglected dogs.
Your "Angel for Animals" sponsorship gift of $1,325 can provide doghouses to five lonely outdoor dogs.
No matter how much you can afford to give, I urge you to respond today. I know that times are tough right now, but it is in times like these when unloved animals suffer most. Nearly all the dogs we reach with our "Angel for Animals" program live in underprivileged neighborhoods. We will fight as hard as we possibly can to ensure that these animals are not mistreated, forgotten, or ignored. Right now, these animals are facing another long winter with nowhere to hide from the stinging cold.
But you can give a doghouse to one lucky dog—likely the first "home" that he or she has ever had. Please become a PETA "Angel for Animals" doghouse sponsor today.
Thank you for helping a neglected dog this winter. Your simple act of kindness can bring one of these dear souls years of shelter, something that they all deserve.
Kind regards,
Ingrid E. Newkirk
President
P.S. Looking for a unique and meaningful gift this holiday season? Give a doghouse sponsorship! When you do, you'll be recognizing that compassionate person as an "angel" for animals. Each "Angel for Animals" sponsorship means that one more needy dog will get a solid-wood doghouse to protect him or her from the cold—and from the summer heat and sun—for years to come.
Sunday, November 02, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Use Your Kroger Card to Benefit PanCAN:
Customer Letter
Step One:
Read through this letter to understand the advantage of being a part of the Kroger Neighbor to
Neighbor Donation Program.
Step Two:
Take the letter with you to your neighborhood Kroger store the next time you go shopping.
Step Three:
Present the letter with your organization’s barcode to your cashier upon checkout. After they
have scanned your KrogerPlus Card you will be enrolled for the current year of the Kroger
Neighbor to Neighbor Donation Program. Every time you shop at Kroger and use your enrolled
KrogerPlus Card, Kroger will contribute a percentage of your eligible purchases to the Kroger
Neighbor to Neighbor Donation fund. Once a card is scanned with the barcode, it will be active
for the remainder of the program year.
Q & A
How many Kroger Neighbor to Neighbor accounts can an organization have?
One per organization. (Example: ABC HIGH SCHOOL account could represent: PTA, cheerleaders, football,
basketball, band, etc.)
Can a household “link” their Kroger Plus Card to more than one organization at a time?
No, the system allows for one organization per household. To change organizations, you must present your
KrogerPlus Card and the new organization’s barcode to the cashier.
Do I have to enroll each program year?
Yes, all organization’s and participants must re-enroll for each new enrollment period. The current Neighbor to
Neighbor Program is effective May 1, 2008 to April 30, 2009.
How much can my organization earn?
The Kroger Neighbor to Neighbor Donation Program will donate $1 million annually. Each organization will earn a
percentage of the $1 million equal to the percentage of total earned contributions attributable to that organization.
How are the funds distributed?
Contributions will be paid via check and mailed to the organization’s address and primary contact identified on the
organization application form. For schools, it will be mailed to the principal and the funds distributed at their
discretion.
Please feel free to contact a Kroger Neighbor to Neighbor Donation Program Representative with any additional
questions at 866-995-7643 or email to neighbortoneighbor@kroger.com. Additional information is also available at
www.krogerneighbortoneighbor.com.
Kroger cashier: Please scan customer’s KrogerPlus Card at the beginning of the order, and then scan the above barcode.
The customer’s KrogerPlus Card is now enrolled in the Kroger Neighbor to Neighbor Donation Program
Customer Letter
Step One:
Read through this letter to understand the advantage of being a part of the Kroger Neighbor to
Neighbor Donation Program.
Step Two:
Take the letter with you to your neighborhood Kroger store the next time you go shopping.
Step Three:
Present the letter with your organization’s barcode to your cashier upon checkout. After they
have scanned your KrogerPlus Card you will be enrolled for the current year of the Kroger
Neighbor to Neighbor Donation Program. Every time you shop at Kroger and use your enrolled
KrogerPlus Card, Kroger will contribute a percentage of your eligible purchases to the Kroger
Neighbor to Neighbor Donation fund. Once a card is scanned with the barcode, it will be active
for the remainder of the program year.
Q & A
How many Kroger Neighbor to Neighbor accounts can an organization have?
One per organization. (Example: ABC HIGH SCHOOL account could represent: PTA, cheerleaders, football,
basketball, band, etc.)
Can a household “link” their Kroger Plus Card to more than one organization at a time?
No, the system allows for one organization per household. To change organizations, you must present your
KrogerPlus Card and the new organization’s barcode to the cashier.
Do I have to enroll each program year?
Yes, all organization’s and participants must re-enroll for each new enrollment period. The current Neighbor to
Neighbor Program is effective May 1, 2008 to April 30, 2009.
How much can my organization earn?
The Kroger Neighbor to Neighbor Donation Program will donate $1 million annually. Each organization will earn a
percentage of the $1 million equal to the percentage of total earned contributions attributable to that organization.
How are the funds distributed?
Contributions will be paid via check and mailed to the organization’s address and primary contact identified on the
organization application form. For schools, it will be mailed to the principal and the funds distributed at their
discretion.
Please feel free to contact a Kroger Neighbor to Neighbor Donation Program Representative with any additional
questions at 866-995-7643 or email to neighbortoneighbor@kroger.com. Additional information is also available at
www.krogerneighbortoneighbor.com.
Kroger cashier: Please scan customer’s KrogerPlus Card at the beginning of the order, and then scan the above barcode.
The customer’s KrogerPlus Card is now enrolled in the Kroger Neighbor to Neighbor Donation Program
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Robin Williams - London
By Terri Rimmer
Published Yesterday
Comedian
Rating: Unrated
Fans of manic stand-up comedian and Oscar winner Robin Williams will once again get to experience the workings of the comic’s mind when he performs in London Nov. 13 and 14 with John Cleese and Rowan Atkinson among others.
The outrageous veteran Hollywood star Williams returns to perform there after a 25-year absence, this time entertaining the crowds for Prince Charles’ 60th birthday, according to research. The 57-year-old will be featured in the event, titled “We Are Most Amused.”
Williams, once described by one writer as a “walking, talking Improv,” traveled the country on a solo stand-up which included three sold-out shows at Upper Darby’s Tower Theater in 2004, according to the Philadelphia Inquirer. In the summer of that year Williams cracked up crowds all across Brentwood in California, performing his unique brand of stream-of-consciousness stand-up in medium-sized venues that sell out fast, stated writer Jenny Peters.
“The son of a Ford Motor Company executive and a fashion model-turned-housewife, Robin Williams didn’t start out on the fast track to comic stardom at all,” writes Peters. “Williams’ incredible high-octane, motor-mouthed stand-up performances quickly became legendary, making him so popular and famous that television quickly beckoned.”
Years later a Charlie Rose interview was by turns enlightening and a laugh riot. (Source: signsonsandiego.com).
In 2003 the high point of an evening featuring St
eve Martin at the Mathematical Sciences Research Institute was Williams who made a surprise appearance.
“In that setting, it was easy to see genius in comedy as not so different from mathematical genius: Both comedians demonstrated an incredible ability to think quickly on their feet, fold remarks back on themselves to form jokes, and draw clever connections between seemingly disparate topics,” wrote Sara Robinson. (http://www.siam.org/news/news.php?id=314).
In 2002 Williams went on a similar live tour as the one he started this September to “recharge his batteries,” as he communicated to a reporter. He attributed the best live comedy performance to the late Richard Pryor’s Live in Concert in an interview.
Williams is also involved with numerous charities including The Gorilla Foundation, Medecins Sans Frontieres, the Pediatric AIDS (Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome), the Make-a-Wish Foundation, the University of California at San Francisco, San Francisco General Hospital Pediatrics, and The Africa Foundation among many others. He also co-founded the Windfall Foundation.
“No matter what anybody tells you, words and ideas can change the world,” Williams once said.
His wild comic talent follows in the footsteps of his child idol, comic Jonathan Winters and Williams has been described as “like no other” by Science Fiction Weekly.
For ticket information on the London shows, see robin-williams.net, empiretickets.com, or ticketmaster.com online.
By Terri Rimmer
Published Yesterday
Comedian
Rating: Unrated
Fans of manic stand-up comedian and Oscar winner Robin Williams will once again get to experience the workings of the comic’s mind when he performs in London Nov. 13 and 14 with John Cleese and Rowan Atkinson among others.
The outrageous veteran Hollywood star Williams returns to perform there after a 25-year absence, this time entertaining the crowds for Prince Charles’ 60th birthday, according to research. The 57-year-old will be featured in the event, titled “We Are Most Amused.”
Williams, once described by one writer as a “walking, talking Improv,” traveled the country on a solo stand-up which included three sold-out shows at Upper Darby’s Tower Theater in 2004, according to the Philadelphia Inquirer. In the summer of that year Williams cracked up crowds all across Brentwood in California, performing his unique brand of stream-of-consciousness stand-up in medium-sized venues that sell out fast, stated writer Jenny Peters.
“The son of a Ford Motor Company executive and a fashion model-turned-housewife, Robin Williams didn’t start out on the fast track to comic stardom at all,” writes Peters. “Williams’ incredible high-octane, motor-mouthed stand-up performances quickly became legendary, making him so popular and famous that television quickly beckoned.”
Years later a Charlie Rose interview was by turns enlightening and a laugh riot. (Source: signsonsandiego.com).
In 2003 the high point of an evening featuring St
eve Martin at the Mathematical Sciences Research Institute was Williams who made a surprise appearance.
“In that setting, it was easy to see genius in comedy as not so different from mathematical genius: Both comedians demonstrated an incredible ability to think quickly on their feet, fold remarks back on themselves to form jokes, and draw clever connections between seemingly disparate topics,” wrote Sara Robinson. (http://www.siam.org/news/news.php?id=314).
In 2002 Williams went on a similar live tour as the one he started this September to “recharge his batteries,” as he communicated to a reporter. He attributed the best live comedy performance to the late Richard Pryor’s Live in Concert in an interview.
Williams is also involved with numerous charities including The Gorilla Foundation, Medecins Sans Frontieres, the Pediatric AIDS (Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome), the Make-a-Wish Foundation, the University of California at San Francisco, San Francisco General Hospital Pediatrics, and The Africa Foundation among many others. He also co-founded the Windfall Foundation.
“No matter what anybody tells you, words and ideas can change the world,” Williams once said.
His wild comic talent follows in the footsteps of his child idol, comic Jonathan Winters and Williams has been described as “like no other” by Science Fiction Weekly.
For ticket information on the London shows, see robin-williams.net, empiretickets.com, or ticketmaster.com online.
Monday, October 06, 2008
Monday, September 29, 2008
Monday, September 22, 2008
Butterflies
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Catch monarch migration in the Texas Hill Country
10:45 AM CDT on Friday, September 19, 2008
By MALECIA EL-AMIN / The Dallas Morning News
mel-amin@dallasnews.com
MARBLE FALLS, Texas -- If you want to get in touch with nature without roughing it, keep an eye out for orange and black in this Hill Country area.
The colors mean the monarch butterflies are back, taking a break on their southbound journey to Mexico.In nature, as in life, there are no guarantees. But the vanguard of the winged migrants usually arrives in Texas in late September and early October, with peak migration in mid-October.
Unless the butterflies rest in a greenbelt or garden near you, Balcones Canyonlands National Wildlife Refuge near Austin is a fairly reliable place for seeing them.
On Oct. 11, preceding National Wildlife Refuge Week (Oct. 12-19), Balcones plans a butterfly celebration among the day's activities. There will be an opportunity for visitors to catch monarchs in nets and tag them at Doeskin Ranch, near Balcones' headquarters.
The tags are used to monitor the migration. "They're like Social Security numbers," says Rob Iski, an outdoor recreation planner at the refuge.
Migrating monarchs travel 300 to 400 miles daily with tailwinds.
Also Online Millions of monarchs end up in Mexico
Texas Hill Country Travel Guide
"It's weather-dependent how far they can go," says Mr. Iski.
If the creatures hit a headwind, they rest and refuel with nectar from flowers.
Those who witness the migration are seeing something unusual. Because of the monarch's relatively short lifespan, "it's five or six generations making this annual cycle," says Mr. Iski. Those insects that start the trip are not those that finish it. The route and urge to travel are instinctive in each flier.
The 22,000-acre Balcones is one of five national wildlife refuges (two in Kansas, one each in Iowa and Florida) that make up the Monarch Butterfly Sister Protected Area Network. The coalition works on habitat preservation, research, public outreach and more. (Some monarchs spend winter in Florida and California.)
The Balcones refuge, which Mr. Iski says may see monarchs into November, has increased the likelihood of the stopovers by planting milkweed outside its headquarters. If you visit, you might be welcomed by monarch chrysalides (butterfly cocoons) hanging near the entrance.
"We just had no idea we were in this spot" for monarch migration, says refuge manager Deborah Holle.
When the weather cooperates, Ms. Holle says, thousands of monarchs flit about the refuge's flowers throughout the day, drinking nectar for their long migration to Mexico.
"At other times," she says, "the wind carries them high overhead and they don't stop at Balcones to nectar. Rather, we see them flying and gliding as spots of orange and black on their way south to their overwintering sites."
There's plenty to see if monarchs are scarce when you visit, or if you want to see the refuge at other times of year. Trails at Warbler Vista, part of the refuge, offer beautiful views. Shin Oak Observation Deck has a gazebo prime for watching birds, especially painted buntings in spring. They're one of about 200 species recorded at the refuge.
"We've actually had birds nesting near the deck," Ms. Holle says.
Information cards around the gazebo show visitors what they're seeing or might see: northern cardinal, black-capped vireo, yellow-breasted chat.
The Doeskin Ranch portion of Balcones is central to its kickoff for National Wildlife Refuge Week. In addition to the possibility of netting monarchs, nature walks and a photography workshop are planned.
Butterflies to birds and beyond, it all has a goal.
"If you can't get people to see wildlife, how are they going to love it?" Ms. Holle asks.
WHEN YOU GO
Getting there
To reach Balcones Canyonlands National Wildlife Refuge from Dallas, take I-35E South toward Waco to I-35. Exit 256 (Chandler Road/FM 1431) and turn right. Proceed for several miles. If you want to go to the reserve headquarters first (open Monday through Friday 8 a.m. to 4:30 p.m.), don't turn at the first refuge sign you see, which will be Warbler Vista. Keep going up the road until you see the rust-colored gates on your right.
National Wildlife Refuge Week
The kickoff event is from 8:30 a.m. to 4 p.m. Oct. 11 at the refuge's Doeskin Ranch on RR 1174. Groups must register. Most activities are free. Call Rob Iski at 512-339-9432, ext. 70.
More information
*Even if you can't make it to Balcones, you can monitor monarchs from your back yard. Contact Monarch Watch ( www.monarchwatch.org) for tagging kits.
*The Dallas County Lepidopterists' Society takes trips to see a variety of butterflies in North Texas. Contact: www.dallasbutterflies.com.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Catch monarch migration in the Texas Hill Country
10:45 AM CDT on Friday, September 19, 2008
By MALECIA EL-AMIN / The Dallas Morning News
mel-amin@dallasnews.com
MARBLE FALLS, Texas -- If you want to get in touch with nature without roughing it, keep an eye out for orange and black in this Hill Country area.
The colors mean the monarch butterflies are back, taking a break on their southbound journey to Mexico.In nature, as in life, there are no guarantees. But the vanguard of the winged migrants usually arrives in Texas in late September and early October, with peak migration in mid-October.
Unless the butterflies rest in a greenbelt or garden near you, Balcones Canyonlands National Wildlife Refuge near Austin is a fairly reliable place for seeing them.
On Oct. 11, preceding National Wildlife Refuge Week (Oct. 12-19), Balcones plans a butterfly celebration among the day's activities. There will be an opportunity for visitors to catch monarchs in nets and tag them at Doeskin Ranch, near Balcones' headquarters.
The tags are used to monitor the migration. "They're like Social Security numbers," says Rob Iski, an outdoor recreation planner at the refuge.
Migrating monarchs travel 300 to 400 miles daily with tailwinds.
Also Online Millions of monarchs end up in Mexico
Texas Hill Country Travel Guide
"It's weather-dependent how far they can go," says Mr. Iski.
If the creatures hit a headwind, they rest and refuel with nectar from flowers.
Those who witness the migration are seeing something unusual. Because of the monarch's relatively short lifespan, "it's five or six generations making this annual cycle," says Mr. Iski. Those insects that start the trip are not those that finish it. The route and urge to travel are instinctive in each flier.
The 22,000-acre Balcones is one of five national wildlife refuges (two in Kansas, one each in Iowa and Florida) that make up the Monarch Butterfly Sister Protected Area Network. The coalition works on habitat preservation, research, public outreach and more. (Some monarchs spend winter in Florida and California.)
The Balcones refuge, which Mr. Iski says may see monarchs into November, has increased the likelihood of the stopovers by planting milkweed outside its headquarters. If you visit, you might be welcomed by monarch chrysalides (butterfly cocoons) hanging near the entrance.
"We just had no idea we were in this spot" for monarch migration, says refuge manager Deborah Holle.
When the weather cooperates, Ms. Holle says, thousands of monarchs flit about the refuge's flowers throughout the day, drinking nectar for their long migration to Mexico.
"At other times," she says, "the wind carries them high overhead and they don't stop at Balcones to nectar. Rather, we see them flying and gliding as spots of orange and black on their way south to their overwintering sites."
There's plenty to see if monarchs are scarce when you visit, or if you want to see the refuge at other times of year. Trails at Warbler Vista, part of the refuge, offer beautiful views. Shin Oak Observation Deck has a gazebo prime for watching birds, especially painted buntings in spring. They're one of about 200 species recorded at the refuge.
"We've actually had birds nesting near the deck," Ms. Holle says.
Information cards around the gazebo show visitors what they're seeing or might see: northern cardinal, black-capped vireo, yellow-breasted chat.
The Doeskin Ranch portion of Balcones is central to its kickoff for National Wildlife Refuge Week. In addition to the possibility of netting monarchs, nature walks and a photography workshop are planned.
Butterflies to birds and beyond, it all has a goal.
"If you can't get people to see wildlife, how are they going to love it?" Ms. Holle asks.
WHEN YOU GO
Getting there
To reach Balcones Canyonlands National Wildlife Refuge from Dallas, take I-35E South toward Waco to I-35. Exit 256 (Chandler Road/FM 1431) and turn right. Proceed for several miles. If you want to go to the reserve headquarters first (open Monday through Friday 8 a.m. to 4:30 p.m.), don't turn at the first refuge sign you see, which will be Warbler Vista. Keep going up the road until you see the rust-colored gates on your right.
National Wildlife Refuge Week
The kickoff event is from 8:30 a.m. to 4 p.m. Oct. 11 at the refuge's Doeskin Ranch on RR 1174. Groups must register. Most activities are free. Call Rob Iski at 512-339-9432, ext. 70.
More information
*Even if you can't make it to Balcones, you can monitor monarchs from your back yard. Contact Monarch Watch ( www.monarchwatch.org) for tagging kits.
*The Dallas County Lepidopterists' Society takes trips to see a variety of butterflies in North Texas. Contact: www.dallasbutterflies.com.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Monday, September 08, 2008
Subject: Comedy Central's Joke of the Day
Comedy Central Games -- Get Your Game On Play massive amounts of games FREE online, anytime.
Just A Juggalo
A man is driving home, when is pulled over by a patrolman for a broken blinker. The cop looks into the guys' car and sees a collection of knives in the backseat. "Sir," the cop says. "Why do you have all those knives?"
"They're for my juggling act," the man says.
"I don't believe you," says the cop. "Prove it." So the man gets out of his car and begins juggling the knives. At the same time, a car with two guys in it drives by.
"Man," says the first guy. "I'm glad I quit drinking. These new sobriety tests are hard."
Love it? Spread the laughter. Hate it? Think you can do better?
Comedy Central Games -- Get Your Game On Play massive amounts of games FREE online, anytime.
Just A Juggalo
A man is driving home, when is pulled over by a patrolman for a broken blinker. The cop looks into the guys' car and sees a collection of knives in the backseat. "Sir," the cop says. "Why do you have all those knives?"
"They're for my juggling act," the man says.
"I don't believe you," says the cop. "Prove it." So the man gets out of his car and begins juggling the knives. At the same time, a car with two guys in it drives by.
"Man," says the first guy. "I'm glad I quit drinking. These new sobriety tests are hard."
Love it? Spread the laughter. Hate it? Think you can do better?
Saturday, September 06, 2008
Subject: Comedy Central's Joke of the Day
Indecision 2008 RNC Coverage We report the facts even before they're true at Indecision2008.com.
Who Let The Blondes Out?
How many blondes does it take to milk a cow? Five - one to hold the udder, and four to lift and the cow up and down.
Love it? Spread the laughter. Hate it? Think you can do better?
Indecision 2008 RNC Coverage We report the facts even before they're true at Indecision2008.com.
Who Let The Blondes Out?
How many blondes does it take to milk a cow? Five - one to hold the udder, and four to lift and the cow up and down.
Love it? Spread the laughter. Hate it? Think you can do better?
Friday, September 05, 2008
Date: Fri, 5 Sep 2008 00:46:10 -0700
Trouble Viewing? Click here.
Hello Terri, Understanding Your Dog's Body Language
Dogs communicate with a rich body-language vocabulary.
LEARN WHAT YOUR DOG IS SAYING
What is Your Dog's "Human" Age? Ever wonder how old your dog is in human years? Not all breeds age alike! Use this special tool to calculate your dog's "human" age.
DOG AGE CALCULATOR
Dealing With Separation Anxiety For some dogs, parting isn't sweet sorrow—it's just sorrow.
HOW TO CURE THE "HOME ALONE" BLUES
Vacation: Where Will You Leave Your Dog? Vacation planning includes figuring out where your dog will stay.
READ THIS BEFORE YOU TAKE YOUR TRIP
What would you like to see in the next issue?
Stop Halloween From Spooking Your Dog
Can Dogs Predict Storms?
5 Must-see Dog Parks
Do Dogs Dream?
Click on a headline to vote for that article
Want to know more? Check out the informative articles in our Article Library.
Trouble Viewing? Click here.
Hello Terri, Understanding Your Dog's Body Language
Dogs communicate with a rich body-language vocabulary.
LEARN WHAT YOUR DOG IS SAYING
What is Your Dog's "Human" Age? Ever wonder how old your dog is in human years? Not all breeds age alike! Use this special tool to calculate your dog's "human" age.
DOG AGE CALCULATOR
Dealing With Separation Anxiety For some dogs, parting isn't sweet sorrow—it's just sorrow.
HOW TO CURE THE "HOME ALONE" BLUES
Vacation: Where Will You Leave Your Dog? Vacation planning includes figuring out where your dog will stay.
READ THIS BEFORE YOU TAKE YOUR TRIP
What would you like to see in the next issue?
Stop Halloween From Spooking Your Dog
Can Dogs Predict Storms?
5 Must-see Dog Parks
Do Dogs Dream?
Click on a headline to vote for that article
Want to know more? Check out the informative articles in our Article Library.
Wednesday, September 03, 2008
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Miller's Marina - Suwannee, FL
Generosity Encompassed His Life - Fort Worth, TX 
Devoted Teacher Remembered by Many - Fort Worth, TX
Fi(gh)t for the Cure
