Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Alanon and Privacy
By Terri Rimmer
Published Today
Health & Medicine
Rating: Unrated
Terri Rimmer
Terri Rimmer has 24 years of journalism experience, having worked for ten newspapers and some magazines. Currently she writes for http://associatedcontent.com. She has a daughter, McKenna, whom she placed for adoption in August 2000. Ms. Rimmer published her e-book "MacKenzie's Hope" on http://booklocker.com under the family heading. It's also listed on http://adopting.com. She resides in Fort Worth, TX. In 2007 she won a Media Award from Associated Content and in 2005 she received a grant from Change, Inc.
View all articles by Terri Rimmer
Traditions Dictate How Privacy Works
I got a call from a friend of mine in recovery Feb. 5 who was upset about a recent article I wrote about Alanon.



She said I shouldn’t have quoted a mutual friend of ours from a meeting even though I only used her first name and no one besides members of our group could even guess who she is. Or not.



“I hope you’re not going to write about what I say in meetings,” my friend said to me. “That is private.”



“I hadn’t planned on it,” I told her.



I listened to her point of view but didn’t apologize because I don’t agree with her.



I took it upon myself to triple check the traditions of Alanon and sure enough as long as you don’t use someone’s full name and/or picture, you are not violating the traditions talking about something they might say in a meeting. (http://www.al-anon-co.org/12_tradition.html).



I have heard theories such as my friend’s before and while I can understand why she feels the way she does and I wouldn’t want my dirty laundry aired in public or online either, I did not violate the traditions of Alanon.



I’m not saying I have all the answers but it’s not like I said the Alanon member’s full name and ran it with her picture (either/or).



Online in chat rooms and support groups via the web everyone in a 12-step group is anonymous as far as having their full identity disclosed.



There even is an Alanon video on You Tube with a man standing against a colorful backdrop. But the man’s identity is not disclosed.



You can even exercise several options of anonymity when you choose to receive emails, updates, or messages from Alanon online. (http://www.ola-is.org/olais/anon.htm).



Beth Daniell of Clemson University came up against the anonymity issue when writing a dissertation on Alanon. Several members were upset with her for addressing various problems that Alanon members discussed in meetings. But Daniell did not identify these women. She did, instead, research the tradition regarding anonymity and pointed it out to the parties of women who were upset with her. The women were questioning her methodology methods. For details, see http://links.jstor.org/sici?sici=0010-096X(199505)46%3A2%3C284%3AICTBEA%3E2.0.CO%3B2-O.



Sometimes when I’ve been to live meetings, either Alcoholics Anomyous or Alanon, I have seen students take notes as part of a class project on AA groups. I have also witnessed college students ask the chairperson ahead of time if it’s okay if they sit in and why they are there. The chairperson of the meeting usually says yes, as long as they don’t identify who shares in the meeting. It has long been a tradition of colleges and various other institutions who are learning about recovery to sit in on meetings to gain an education about how this stuff works.



Back in the 80s and 90s I didn’t like these “imposters” coming into “our meetings.” But now I realize what they’re doing is a gift to recovering people and to society because the students are learning about AA and they, in turn, are going back and reporting their findings to their class. If in the process some people are getting educated about recovery and what really goes on in meetings regarding honesty, humility, recovery, and new beginnings, how can that be a bad thing?



The same thing applies to online meetings.